Apparently a few days ago Mom got a call that her biopsy had come back cancerous. I did not know this… apparently she doesn’t want me to worry. I knew her follow up with the surgeon was today so I called her at noon and found out the appointment was 1:30pm. She told me to quit worrying and I told her to call me when she was done… I was ready to hear all clear and resume our regularly scheduled programming.
When she hadn’t called me back by 4 I was starting to get pissed. This meant one of two things. It was bad news or she was showing me she doesn’t have to call me back if she doesn’t want to… she’s the mother, I’m the child. Of course, she wasn’t answering her phone either. Finally got ahold of her a little before 5, she was on her way home from Costco she’d talk to me later… “Mom, is it bad news”; “Yes it is and I’ll discuss it with you when I’m not driving and I don’t have to pee”. So I waited by the phone. About 15 minutes later she called me.
The sucky news is it’s cancer. The bright side is it’s non-invasive, still in the duct and we’ve caught it early. She’s opted for a “simple mastectomy”. She felt radiation would be too much of an inconvenience and she wants this over with as soon as possible. She will have the surgery the 23rd. I’m taking her. It wasn’t until later when I was talking to her youngest sister that I found out she found out about the cancer yesterday and was told her options. She apparently told EVERYONE but me. And told them she wasn’t telling me. She’s my Mom. She still thinks of me as “little”. Like I think of Tank. And she would never think of burdening me with all of this. Ugh. This is the woman who wouldn’t let my husband take me to the cardiologist last year, she had to go. I’m seriously thinking of next time I have something medical going on just not telling her and saying “I didn’t want you to worry”. She would absolutely kill me!
Her biggest concern when she talked to me, if I take her to the hospital does that mean I can’t take the next Friday off to take Robert to the kiddie farm with my aunt. Oh for heaven’s sake!
So, she’s still my Mom… hard headed as ever, refusing to acknowledge I’m an adult and I can “take it” and part of me really loves her for that. (The other part is going to wring her neck).
Jim got home from Sioux City today and is sick. I don’t sleep well at all when he’s gone so the last good night’s sleep I got was Saturday. He’s coughing and hacking and I’m almost to the point of wishing he had just stayed in Iowa… I’m so horrible. Tomorrow he goes to the doctor.